GOD DAMN IT EVERY TIME THIS IS ON MY DASH I NEARLY THROW UP LAUGHING
I didn’t find this that funny until I realized that was somebody’s foot.
I’m always the friend that’s left behind
Hardest thing to answer: Describe yourself.
i.e. how do i talk about my positives without sounding cocky and negatives without coming across as self depreciating
Police officers rescued the little pup from an abusive owner. And then one adopted her.
The teacher said ‘hit the lights’ and this kid punched the light switch and broke it
people who eat a lot of junk food and still manage to stay thin
I just saw my sisters black bra on her bed and I thought it was my dog and patted it b y e
Babies sneezing is the best thing
I need to lose 30 pounds in today
imagine having your dads face as a neck-tie
i hate when men complain about women’s body hair, even like the fine hair on their backs. go fuck a shark if you wanna have sex with something hairless
My mum broke her wrist and didnt want to go to her dinner party with an ugly cast so I broke out some brushes and painted Van Gogh’s ” Starry night ” on it for her.
oh yeah, no biggie, lemme just whip out my brushes and paint a lil something-something. easy.